Stork Club Secrets

My landlord, Mr. Ed, was 99 years old.  As far as anyone could tell, he subsisted entirely on cherry red LifeSavers. Most would fall between his armchair, which smelled like a dumpster, and his khakis where they would adhere in a row of sticky red globs. Children and some unkind adults would point fingers and laugh as he plodded down the street to the local C'Town market.  He seemed to cotton to me as I found it relaxing to sit and drink Rob Roys while listening to his endless tales. One was about procuring an original Van Gogh painted plate at a movie give-away in the 1930's.  It did not look like a Van Gogh.  

The other item he liked to talk about was an ashtray from the Stork Club where he was once a regular.  Mr. Ed figured out the owner's secret sign language as he table hopped around the club.  One evening the owner said he could take an ashtray home with him. This story held more interest for me. I coveted said ashtray. In a moment of weakness, and as I clearly was tenant of the month, Mr. Ed sold it to me for $15. As it turns out Stork Club owner Sherman Billingsley did indeed keep control of the action at the club through a series of hand signals to his help. True story. I wonder now about the Van Gogh plate.

The Irritable Shoeshine Man

The most interesting part of a shoe-shine box isn’t the actual box, but the wild story that is behind it. Shoe shiners where a diverse group, but they always had one thing in common; a crazy attitude that was needed to be a shiner.

Take for example this 1920’s piece. At a first glance, it might just seem like a very simple box. A closer look however shows the story of a man who shouldn’t be in customer service. Above the shoe rest is written “look at your shoe”, meaning the customer has to stare at the floor the whole time and not make any eye contact. Below that on the hatch he has written “mind your own damn business”, as if the customer is going to be nosy while staring at the floor.

Even the actual red lettering seems angry. He originally had the price written at 5 cents, but wrote 10 cents on top without covering up the original price. It’s like the discount stores that show the manufacturer’s price and then their cheaper price, but the exact opposite. He wants double his money, and doesn’t care who knows.

Who knows if this actually worked, maybe the customers thought the attitude was funny, or appreciated his no-b.s. approach. Or his shines where just so good that he could take the “Soup Nazi” tactic. Either way it’s clear you needed to stick out to make it in the business.